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June 18,2006
By Margot | June 18, 2006
Happy Father’s Day! It’s four in the morning before Father’s Day but I can’t sleep so I thought I’d get up and wish all dads a happy day. To Neil, who is the dad at every party that is out there wrestling with the kids or playing tag, using his every other Friday off to go have lunch with Sammy at Kindergarten and who always makes sure every kid is included – even the really shy ones. He jumps in all the ice cold pools with the kids and wakes up early to go get donuts for Ninja Camp. He changes into his swimming suit and takes Andy swimming in the big pool when he is too scared to go down the water slide at the birthday party. He comes to doctor’s checks with a surprise for Sammy every time so that it’s not so bad and he researches every spare second he has on neuroblastoma. I sometimes think of that old joke about the guy who is stuck on his roof during a flood and a boat comes by and he says, “No thank you, God will save me.” and then a helicopter comes by and he says, “No thank you, God will save me ” and then a Coast Guard boat comes and he says, “No thank you, God will save me.” Then when he isn’t saved he gets to heaven and says, “God, why didn’t you save me?” and God says, “I sent you a boat a helicopter and the Coast Guard, what more do you want?” I feel like Neil has built us a life raft from the shingles and is paddling as hard as he can all the time.
The boys are lucky to have such a dad.
To my dad, who is my hero and has flown out many many times in the past year and a half just to sit and hold my hand and help listen to doctors and make decisions and who has taught me about kindness and doing the right thing.
To all the cancer dads who go to work bleary eyed after sitting up all night with their children and who have lived through a terror that most dads don’t know.
Hope you all get lots of hugs from your kids today.
Sammy is doing well. We had a doctor’s check and blood draw last week and things look good. The next round of scans is being scheduled for the week of July 17th between camps and after his birthday. Tuesday he graduates from Kindergarten. He got an award last week for being kind and considerate to his classmates and I cried through the whole assembly, just think of what a wreck I’ll be on Tuesday. It was a fitting award for him though because he is so sweet. We were at the hospital getting a blood check last week and I bought him some M&Ms after the pokey and the pack got stuck in the vending machine so I had to put in more quarters and we got two packs. Instead of saving them for later he said, “Mom, let’s give this pack to the nurses so they can give it to someone who really might need M&Ms today. It was so cute. He’s had many days when he really needed M&Ms. We are, by the way, working on a very lean protein and high vegetable diet to go along with the vitamins but a pokey definitely warrants M&Ms. Sammy and I were talking about hearing aids the other day and he was lamenting over the fact that we don’t have water-proof hearings aids. I’ve since found out they do make them but they are ridiculously expensive for a couple hour’s swim – maybe if he grows up and joins the swim team. Anyway, he said, “I wish they made hearing aids that could go in the water. Hey, maybe they will in my lifetime – that way my kids can wear them” -pause- “if they have to have chemo. I hope they don’t have to have chemo.” “I hope so too buddy,” I told him.
I bought him a pair of nice pants for graduation and we had them tailored today and he looked like such a little man! I can’t believe it. Grandma Sara is flying in today to see his graduation.
Andy is doing great too. Growing more and more every day. He’s definitely in his “Why?” phase. The following is a typical discussion I have with Andy ….. “Mom, why is stupid a bad word?” and I say, “Well because it makes people feel bad if you tell them that they are stupid, but you can say this “stupid” door won’t open or something like that.” “Oh,” he answers “Why is dammit a bad word?” “Well,” I say, “it’s just not a nice word to say.” “Well, why is shut up a bad word.” “It’s nicer to say ‘please be quiet’, shut up makes people feel bad.” “Oh, why can’t we touch babies?” (another of his favorite questions since he met brand new baby Thomas) “Well, we can touch their little feet, but really little babies can catch germs easily, so we don’t want to touch them on their hands or their faces, when they grow up a little bit it’s ok to touch them, we just have to remember to be gentle.
Andy, give me that, it’s dangerous.” “Mommy, you have to say, ‘May I have that please?'”
Please say some prayers for Benny Petz and his family. His mother is an amazing writer and is a symbol of strength in a horrific time. Courage in action and sure to bring tears: http://www.bennylove.com
Margot
Topics: Progress Reports | Comments Off on June 18,2006
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